Life is Now a Blank Canvas on Which You Redesign Your Future - ACT Now!

Now is the Time for Change

It is hard to change.  A fact we all know from personal experience.  We go on a diet and immediately have cravings for all the wrong food.  We decide to workout 3 times a week and we find a hundred excuses why we "can't start today".

When we do manage to take that first step we feel awkward, as if we were taking our first steps and feared we would fall over.  The fear of failure, of giving up, of not being ready for the challenge, creates anxiety, sometimes so strong we just give in and make a plan to begin again - tomorrow.

The bad news is we must experience these feelings if we are to succeed at achieving personal transformation.  We must be ready to accept it is hard.  We must be ready to accept that on a subconscious level we will try to negotiate change without trying.  That we will wake up in the morning and its done.

Add to that the waves of emotions that will encompass us each day we take the next step toward change.  We will wake up wondering why are we doing this to ourselves.  I'm really so unhappy with how things are now?  I managed to change a little, so I think I'll be happy with that.

But we are pursuing change because we want something different.  A healthier life, more time for friends and family, a new career.

So, the good news is, it is easier than we allow ourselves to believe.  Can you remember when you first learned to write your letters?  Why back in First and Second grade when you would struggle to make a decent letter "B".  Then without knowing the moment, one day you were filling pages of your journal with words you once had trouble spelling.  Authentically, you learned to read and write and it became a part of you just as the changes you desire to make now will one day be a part of you.

So here are some things to consider as you start your journey to Authentic Change and Transformation.

1. In a study conducted by Dr. Phillippa Lally in 2009, she found that it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes authentic.  Research on 96 patients and supporting data found it to be 66 days.  However, the study also revealed that it could be anywhere from 18 days to 254 days depending on the person and the habit or behavior they seek to modify.  
2. Nobody's perfect, so don't beat up on yourself if you miss a day or two.  That is no reason to quit.  It is normal.  The key is to learn from it.  What emotions were you feeling if any, when you gave in to old behavior?  What was the situation, environment, challenges around you at the time.  Change is more than the decision.  Our decision to change is only the first step.  Then as we change, we see where our behavior fits into varying moments in our lives.  For example, we may want to stop eating in bed.  But eating in bed goes with watching television in bed for you.  So you end up needing to change the habit of watching television in bed as well.  What we do is connected to many other aspects of our lives.  Accepting this and acknowledging it helps us to not only change the desired behavior but others we had never thought about at the time. 
3. Yes, you are going to ride a roller coaster of emotions.  Let yourself feel them.  So walk through your emotions, feel them, then get back on point.  We pursue change because we are bored, or feeling as if we just can't cope any longer.  When we decided to change we are filled with joy, at least until we begin.  Then we wonder, how will I handle this, why did I pick such a challenge behavior to change.  We get fearful and sometimes give in, angry at ourselves for being weak.  But this is how the process of change feels when you are on the right track.  So embrace the fear, and know you are on the road to creating a new behavior that will create a happier you!

One thing is certain: When we emerge from this crisis of Covid19 nothing will be as it was.  We will face new normals.  During this downtime, however, we have a chance to review our goals and dreams, evaluate where we have come from and now given the choice how do we want to move forward.

When the doors swing open and you emerge from you Sheltering In Place mode, will you turn back to the life you had and try to make it fit in the new normal, or will you recognize you have a chance for new beginnings?  Everything we thought was important has disappeared and we are still standing.  Why not stand on the dreams and desires you have always coveted when "real life" got in the way.

STAY CALM!!!! FIVE THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO IN THE COVID19 CRISIS

The 5 Things NOT to do during the CV19 Crisis - and 2 that you should do!

Let's all take a deep breath and hold it for 10 seconds.  Now release and take a sip of water.  You have just accomplished three important tasks with little effort.  A) You held your breath for 10 seconds without coughing, a sign there is no Covid19 in your lungs; (B) You drank water which is good for keeping the mouth healthy and preventing CV19 from moving into your lungs; and most importantly, C)  You calmed down.

The best thing we can do for ourselves is to remain calm.  The actions we take are important to our wellbeing.  We can prepare for the best possible outcome or the worst possible outcome.  Since we have NO idea what is coming next, let's just chill, prepare for the best, and make today as joy-filled as possible. 

That doesn't mean ignore the crisis.  It means prepare sensibly; think positively, and live calmly.  If you avoid doing these 5 things, you may just make it through this without breaking down.

1.  Don't: Stockpile Toilet Paper.  

A clear sign of unclear thinking.  A clear sign of irrational panic.  Plus you know your friends are talking about you! There is plenty of toilet paper in the stores and failing that there is your garden hose!

2.  Don't: Think of the Negatives.  

Don't worry about how the rent will get paid or what will happen to your job.  Don't think about what will happen if you catch it.  Don't freak out about a post-apocalyptic world.  Stay positive.  This too shall pass.

3.  Don't: Scare your kids.  

We want them to be cautious and careful, but filling their heads with what could happen if they catch it, is like telling them the monsters under their bed are angry with them. What scares us often scares them.  Teach don't terrify.

4. Don't: Lock yourself away.  

For goodness sakes open some windows.  You need fresh air.  You need sunshine.  Don't deny yourself some outdoor times, it is as important to maintaining good health as washing your hands.

5.  Stop watching the news.  

This is not the haunted house at an amusement park you don't have to spend the day scaring yourself with all the new - and recycled - news stories.  Turn off the 24-hour doom and gloom and watch a funny movie.  All bad and nothing good destroys your peace of mind.

Remember to: 

1.  Prepare for a normal life, not the apocalypse.  Try to keep your routine as close to normal as possible.

2.  Use the newfound free time to work on a hobby or learn a new skill.  

When this is all over - and it will be - you don't want the memories of the experience to give you post-traumatic stress disease (PTSD)  A strong positive mindset now will keep you healthy for the future.